Whitney Baker, LMFTA
I have been on both sides of the arguments. I have been the one keeping the running list of what still needs doing and who has not noticed. I have also been the one getting corrected, loading the dishwasher wrong, forgetting the thing that was said on Tuesday, doing the task in a way that technically worked but not the way it was supposed to be done.
That turns out to be useful. When a man tells me he has stopped trying because nothing he does lands right, I know exactly what he means, and I am not going to pretend his side is unreasonable. When his partner tells me she is exhausted from managing everything, I know she is right too. Both of those are true at the same time, which is the whole problem and the whole job.
The rest of it is patterns. Thirteen years of listening to people describe six-year fights and watching the same three moves show up in the same order. It never stops being interesting, and it is the part I am actually good at.
Who I Work With
Couples running the same fight on repeat. From inside the loop it looks like a fight about the dishes. From a chair across the room it is easy to see, and once you can see it you can stop running it.
People deciding whether to stay. No one here is going to push you toward the door or away from it. Some people leave with a plan to rebuild. Some leave with a plan to leave.
Individuals doing their own work. You came alone because you already know your side needs attention. Your partner does not have to be involved.
People rebuilding after divorce. Co-parenting with someone you could not stay married to, or dating again and watching the old pattern show up with someone new.
First responders and their partners. I am a volunteer firefighter and EMT. When someone tells me they cannot turn it off at home, I am not guessing.
How I Work
Gottman-trained and attachment-based, with additional training in therapy for first responders and their families. Thirteen years in mental health and social services. Licensed in Washington and Idaho.
Most of the couples I see are not out of love. They are out of language, and that part is teachable.
Where I Work
All sessions are online, which means I can see anyone located in Washington or Idaho. Clients join from Spokane, Coeur d'Alene, Tri-Cities, Pullman, Walla Walla, Wenatchee, Boise, Moscow, Post Falls, Sandpoint, and small towns that do not have a relationship therapist within an hour's drive.
Evening and early morning appointments available.